The Journey, 2 years on...

The Party's Over (For Now)... But I Might Believe It's Love (Still)

The Journey Begins...
It started like this... one day, having become a reality-TV slave, especially of the "talent"-type of reality shows, I saw a commercial for a show called "Rockstar: INXS." I remembered the band from the '80s/90s hits, and that they had lost their lead singer (what was his name?) to presumed suicide. It looked like from the commercials that the music would be "rock" as opposed to the stuff of American Idol, so I was pretty psyched as "Hard Rock" really floats my boat. So I tuned in on July 11, 2005... as the commercials instructed me to do... and there I saw INXS (they looked vaguely familiar) and 15 performers vieing to front INXS. Not really knowing the band and what would be "roit" for them, I was initially impressed by Jordis, Ty and Mig... Marty being from my neck of the woods drew my interest... Suzie sounded good and although she messed up her lyrics, I didn't think she deserved to go home... JD, well, what can I say? I appreciated that he was relieved not to go home, but I wasn't initially impressed overmuch (Did he just play with that girl's hair?!?!). Dana - bye, bye! (At this point, and for the forseeable future, I figured that Mig had a slight leg up, being from Australia and all.) Anyway, I enjoyed the performances (rock on TV!) so much, I made my brother watch it (and I watched again) when he came home that night... From that point on, I missed not an episode.... It became an addiction (I laughed, I cried, I cringed). I looked for people in real life to discuss it with, but never really found anyone with whom I could discuss it. Even my brother was too busy to catch most of the episodes, but I kept him apprised. Who was my favorite???? I think deep (very deep) in my heart, I was pulling for JD, especially after Pretty Vegas... but I couldn't admit it outloud, given the "evil editing." I still thought Mig had a good shot (remember, I DIDN"T KNOW THE BAND AND WHAT WAS "ROIT" FOR THEM - I was a bit of an idiot, just looking at who had the best singing voice). However, I knew they wouldn't pick Marty, so pacing a hotel room the night of the finale, when Mig was booted, I knew, just knew, JD had won... But still I paced, and called my brother at home, and we "watched" the end together... Holy shit! "JD, you are roit for our band, INXS." Squeeeeeee! I was so happy I could have screamed (except I was in a hotel LOL).So, now what do I do???? I want to discuss this with SOMEBODY, I have it all bottled inside. I had never voted, and I had never gone to the website while the show was on. But I finally checked out the official MSN site and found lots of goodies there to explore, including a messageboard. I'd never been on a messageboard! But I found them talking all about Rockstar and JD. I read for hours and hours... then I finally got the nerve to sign up and post... though only a few. I found LAXguy's recap of the finale and read it a zillion times. It made me so happy! Then MSN's board shut down... so I followed a few "friendly faces" to another board and then another... and finally found a home at Rockband. I lurked and lurked, then signed up and posted... kindred spirits! Yeah! OMG, being able to talk to people about what Rockstar:INXS meant to me... that was truly incredible, and addicting. I've never downloaded anything online before (what is megaupload???), but I clicked left, right and center, listening to and reading all the interviews I could get my hands on! What a truly wonderful world, this online fan community, because of it I smiled and smiled as I heard the interviews... I didn't have to give up the high of RS:INXS yet...

The Concert (okay, concerts, it was only supposed to be one!)
So, the concert dates are announced.... and I figure, hey, I wanna go! Look at the schedule... FUCK! (Yes, I said it LOL!).... INXS is in Chicago when I will be in Las Vegas for my annual Superbowl trip.... Fuck, fuck, fuck! So, what do I do?????? Could I (gulp) go to a concert in another state?!?! Will everyone thing I am nuts to travel to another state to see a concert??? Ah, who cares! So, Detroit or St. Louis, Detroit or St. Loius? St. Louis because it is winter and presumably warmer, less snow... I sneak off a few minutes at work with my laptop and get ready for the fan club pre-sale.... yes, 2 seats on the floor (10th row)!...Squeeeeeeeee! I'm so excited, but I try the regular sale too.. and 2nd row seats come up! I've now got 4 tickets and only need 1 really LOL... (and so the excessive ticket buying begins...). I give away my other 3 tickets to people on the online boards, then pack for St. Louis (St. Charles actually). And around 5pm the day before the concert, I get an email.... "The St. Charles concert has been postponed due to illness." Shit, shit, shit! I have my Vegas trip booked to fly out of St. Louis the day after the new cancelled concert... Scramble to the phone, "airline, can I switch my flight??? NO??? Ugh!" So off I fly to St. Louis, even though INXS isn't there, in order to get to Vegas... (and it turns out they are hanging in Chicago LOL).

Another St. Louis trip is planned, and finally off I go to the concert on Feb 28, 2006... I was invited by a very nice women to attend the acoustic show with JD, Kirk and Andrew before the concert. I get there second row in front of the stage! OMG, this is too good to be real. And weird too... being so close to people that I've seen on TV... And the music is so good and JD is so funny....

Then the concert... I briefly meet a handful of RBers who have 1st row... then I go to my seat, 2nd row, TnT starts (how cool!), then bang! Suicide Blonde!!! The music pounds through me, I'm smiling like no tomorrow, JD sounds soooo goood, his chatter is kind of awkward LOL... oh, what bliss! With about 5 songs left in the show, 3 people from the front row leave! WTF? So I now get to stand at the rail in front of the stage for the rest of the concert! Squeeeeeeee - first row! I'd never before been even near the floor at a concert, and suddenly I'm first row for the band that has truly captured my attention, and heart, and soul since they uttered those infamous words "JD, you are right for our band, INXS." Oh, geez, can it get any better?
(See INXS Concert St. Charles February 28, 2006 blog entry for much more detail.)

Then the concert was over... it was so compelling, it made me feel so good, but there was a letdown too... this was it? The end of the road for me???? Um.... no! The natural "high" you get at the end of the show that prompts you to ask "When can I do this again?" was present and accounted for. INXS announces more dates, and off I go to ticketbastard, et al.... Nashville, Cincy, add on Memphis with a front row ticket from CFI... then London (ON), Toronto, Niagara Falls (traveling to another country for concerts? Have I lost my freaking mind?!?)... Milwaukee, then Rosemont ... Tickets in hand, I'm off for many an adventure with my RB friends!

It was a blast, BSC roadtrips, huge pre-concert parties, Meet & Greets, after-concert parties, bars with BINXS :-). And the band just got better and better...

I saw JD at a point of having just come out of his chrysalis stage – wonderful and new and exciting and perfect but just a tiny bit awkward too. Then moving on to Memphis/Nashville/Cinny - he was a full-fledged frontman. There was an ease about him with a command of the stage, a comfort zone that JD found; I felt like he had arrived and fit into that place that was meant to be his. It was electric and beautiful to watch. JD was graceful and powerful. I didn’t sense any awkwardness, just sexy, sinful, playful, funny, gorgeous INXS – complete *sigh* Destiny fulfilled dripping from each note.

Then more concerts and more... The power of the BINXS was always in the air, the joy from the band and the fans cumulating til I almost couldn’t breath. The emotions built and built inside me from seeing this awesome band – so sweet and humble and funny in person – so engrossing and powerful on stage. JD was now the MAN, the master of the stage, Tim, Kirk, Andrew, Garry and Jon were almost one, a tight unit, a family with their new brother. It is impossible to try to explain the true perfection of the concerts at the end, no wrong notes, the sweetness, the laughs, the solemnity, the rightness, the connection, the band that is INXS.

My recaps, if you are enjoying my story, if not, skip!!!! :-):
The BSC Trifecta:
Memphis: See INXS Concert Memphis April 21, 2006 blog entry
Nashville: See INXS Concert Nashville April 22, 2006 blog entry (The M&G stuff in here is funny, if I do say so myself LOL)
Cincinnati: See INXS Concert Cincinatti April 23, 2006 blog entry
Milwaukee: http://www.rockbandlounge.com/forum/topic.asp?topic_id=2737&whichpage=1

The Concerts 2007
So after a long, long concert hiatus for me (14 months!), I end up at the Milwaukee concert (Summerfest) and am greeted by many of my old (and new!) RBL friends... plus 100 degree heat. I managed to ward off sunburn with SPF 70 LOL and an umbrella. The BINXS ended up waiting til the sun went down to start the concert, but oh, man, was it worth it! I felt real lust in my... um... heart.... upon seeing JD in his long-hair and sunglasses, then wow, Garry in a cowboy hat! Was it the heat or the hawtness that made me lightheaded LOL? Front row once again, how I missed it, having gotten used to the view from the previous year...It was awesome, awesome, awesome. I had so longed to see the BINXS again... and wow, what a difference 14 more months of performing together makes... Did I say that last year JD was the MAN.... now he is the GOD LOL... a rockstar GOD, so cool, collected, yet beautifully out-of-control on stage... the songs, the same as I heard last year, yet different, better?, lots more JD in them, using his voice to make them more his own, add his flair, his falsetto, his stamp... Oh, am I glad to be there to witness it! And then again... it's over... But luckily, I know that I will be seeing them again in a week...
Milwaukee recap: http://www.rockbandlounge.com/forum/topic.asp?topic_id=5648&whichpage=1

I join the RBL bandwagon and head to Ottawavegas for the Ottawa Bluesfest. I admit it, INXS was not the top bill for me here, although participating in the pogoing and fun of the RBL corporate box was an experience like none other. To hang with all of the friends that I've make at RBL was an experience not to be missed... and the BINXS sounded great too! This adventure ended way too soon, I didn't get to speak to everyone nearly long enough, but then we were off in a few caravans to the Barrie concert...

Barrie - Front row again, babee! Oh, yeah, this is it! I remember now why I'm addicted to INXS and their concerts... standing there, right in front of them, watching the fun and joy on stage, oh, and did I mention the hawtness too?! A verse sung to me by JD *sigh*... Yes, it was a blast, a shining light in the universe of my boring RL... and it was then over already????? No, no, no, no, no!!!!! Off to buy more tickets... Cleveland, Timonium... then yes, how could I skip the last show of the Switched On Tour?, Loudoun...

Then, WFT???, Cleveland is cancelled. How could this happen??? But I decided to go anyway (a 2nd INXS adventure where I was there and INXS was not LOL), hanging with the lovely rocker and numbers. Who needs the BINXS? *phfft* Okay, I do, so off the next day to Timonium.... numbers and I head off to the concert, to meet up with BH, Mii, BTP, and others already standing in the heat, lining up for the show... f2k5 and SK join us... Then the stupid ticket taking fiasco... then the running of the bulls (part I) across the vast plains known as the Maryland State Fair racetrack infield... in my "special" shoe due to my hurt toe... not my best running endeavor, ended up third row, then due to the kindness and shifting of others, the 2nd row...

Timonium - I must say, that although I wasn't front row and at times I couldn't even see anything at all when I was in the 3rd row, this was the absolute best concert of the BINXS I have been at. It was JD's birthday, he was excited, and it showed. He was so on, I loved every note, Milwaukee sounded so good, but this was 10 times more, JD's voice was on, he has "playing" with some of the songs like I like since I've heard them so often... the way that the band was together, the oneness, the playfulness, the drags of JDs cigarettes by the others, it just all came together and I couldn't stop smiling... JD was funny, playing with the fact that he was told to stop swearing, bristling a little under the "censureship"... I got to hear Elegantly Wasted in person again, New Sensation kicked off the concert, a first for me... and The Loved One sounded great, although unfamiliar to me... I sang along, and sang along (well, except for TLO LOL). The music was the star of the night, JD's joy in it, Garry's, Andrew's, Jon's, Tim's, Kirk's joy in it... it shown through the stage lights and darkness of the night... These guys are a family on stage... and birthday wishes abounded... balloons from the audience could be seen bouncing around...

So, on to Loudoun two days later... another GA show, standing in line, another running of the bulls (part II) across a field. This time I came prepared LOL... I had on running shoes and ran my heart out, easily getting front row this time... although I wanted to stand with my friends BH and numbers, so I butted in between them, instead of finding an open spot. (Thanks, gals! Luckily, I'm half of what I used to be LOL.) There were a couple opening bands, for some reason BH thought one guitarist performed in both bands?!? :-) (don't worry, it's a joke, I know he did...).... Then, after waiting at the venue since 1:30pm... BINXS time was finally there, success had been had getting front row, so now all that waited was the performance... the last one of the tour.... I was looking forward to it, and yet I didn't want it to start because once it did, it meant it would soon be over... How would I face that??? I wasn't a long time fan, but through Rockstar:INXS I became invested in their endeavor, their journey, I wasn't ready to see the end, the end of this chapter at least... However, the show did go on... We had heard in advance from the concert the night before, JD's voice was hoarse, so it seemed that this would probably have an impact tonight too... And yes, JD performed all the songs and had fun doing it, but he performed them "straight" so to speak... no little runs, and nuances, no falsetto, but lower octives... different, but still special, since it was the last one... JD is hoarse and the sound perhaps not so great, that it was difficult to understand a lot of what he said between songs... During The Loved One, I wasn't singing along, since I'm not familiar with the words yet after only one hearing... and then all of the sudden JD is crouched in front of me, motioning for my little fedora hat, firmly on my head guarding me from the sun... I reach forward as far as I can to hand it to him, he reaches forward and gets it... and plops it on his head..... Oh, man, does he look 10,000 times better in it than me, or what??? YES! *sigh* On the concert goes, no Never Let You Go though, then Pretty Vegas starts. So soon??? Can that be right??? Alas, it is... clapping and clapping, out they come for the encore, the harmonica starts up... Suicide Blonde, oh, yes, those familiar beats, those familiar hips, ah, yes, I love this band! And before Never Tear Us Apart, JD tells us that Garry will be getting married on Sept 15th and that this one is for him... Garry bows to the the applause, and off they go... 2nd to last song... no, I'm no ready, please, please, I don't want to hear Don't Change! But as all things must, the end comes... and Don't Change rings out. And then the drum solo.... and then.... *sniff* JD comes up to the mic, to thank everyone.... in a first (for me to see at least), then rest of the band links up and comes forward to stand with JD at the mic stand... Tim announces into the mic "Our brother JD Fortune"... and some backslapping and hugging... and then, off they go, JD on Kirk's (I think it was Kirk's) back.... Jon lingers.... looks around, then turns and walks off... And then I had to wipe my eyes, I felt the emotion of saying goodbye, not sure how this 2 year journey they had taken was going to be re-invented for the future, not sure how/when I would again get to part of this wonderful journey, even if my part was so small.... Oh, but so glad I was there for this end, that is not an end I'm sure...

Experience
What can I say that hasn't already been said... Rockstar:INXS did change my life. Really, and truly. I was in a rut, work, work, work, drifting away from friends... with a void in my life. Now, I realize that RS:INXS is a television show, it in itself didn't fill the void, but all of the people, the RBLers I now call friends, you have filled that void... allowing me to speak about my interests and my passions, including Rockstar:INXS and tennis LOL. And the BINXS allowed me a peak into their life, their passions, their journey, so that I could partake in their endeavor too... And I thank them from the bottom of my heart because I have never had so much fun letting my hair down and being absolutely batshit crazy, travelling to other states and another country (3 times!), 14 concerts in all, for little old me, who hasn't seen one other band more than once in my life... I've acted like a BSI, and I've loved it, it is so not me, but it is liberating. And it is because of the BINXS, but even more so because of RBLers who have allowed me to embrace this unknown part of me and supported me, dare I say enabled me??? LOL...

INXS, I'm so sorry I didn't know you when, but I know you now, and I will know you in the future, I hope... INXS touched me during the show, I don't normally get so invested, because they were looking for someone to complete the band, allowing them to move on to a new chapter, continue to make wonderful music together, entertain us, make us laugh, make us cry, give us new friends, new experiences, new music, new... well, you get the picture. The band feels complete to me, I hope it does to them... and the journey JD has taken, has been a joy to watch.... I'll never forget the first concert performance (he seemed so young, and somewhat insecure) nor the last, where he owned himself, the crowd, the stage... I certainly hope that the journey isn't over... because although I think JD's and the band's destiny has been fulfilled, dripping from each wonderful note, it has not reached its culmination.... Imagine what the future holds....

My Favorite Memories/Things From The Last 2 Years

20 of my favorite things/memories since July, 2005, not in any particular order
1) LAXguy's RS:I recaps
2) B.C. (before crack), rewatching and rewatching JD's performances on the MSN official website after JD won, sitting in my hotel rooms (although I got sick of the Honda commercial!)
3) Las Vegas Pity Party (aka The Non-Vegas-Concert-Goers Support Group) that I helped "host" with jc4jd and mod Bouffe... truly an awesome evening... with the footed Purell bottle and the "F5" key :-)
4) The one night where in the talk thread, things were so crazy with so many people posting that replying to a message meant you got 4 pages behind in reading... I was laughing by myself in hysterics...
5) Traveling to Missouri, Tennessee, Ohio, Maryland, Virginia, Wisconsin and Canada (3 times!) to see the BINXS... For St. Charles, I thought I was insane going to another state for a concert, with the rest, I proved it LOL.
6) That first "Taste" of front row... in St. Charles at my first INXS concert... *swoon*
7) BSC car rides with W.A.T.T., Mii, numbers, Saxqueen, Ember, BH, a BSC weekend in Milwaukee with b4beth, and talking everything INXS with JYM until the wee hours in Toronto
8) "Chat"ting until 6a.m., more than once LOL with the "Chat" girls...
9) JD's performance of YCAGWYW on Sept 20, 2005... oh and the "JD you are roit for our band, INXS" annoucement and aftermath, of course...
10) JD's hair at the beginning of the Summerfest concert, the special fluttering of the wind giving peeks of a yummy tummy... oh, and Garry in his cowboy hat! :-)
11) Meeting almost 100 of you wonderful RBLers!!!!!!!!!! I'm so glad I got to meet each and every one of you!
12) Garry motioning to me my sign was upside down during Cincy concert... and all of us laughed...
13) Voiceless in Memphis, Nashville, and Cincy :-)
14) Waiting with baited breath for the "private" Toronto concert to play on the radio/online in Nov 2005, scared to death that the internet would cut out so I would miss it... and then listening to the show, of course
15) Everyone here being so nice after my medical ordeal last year, getting cards and calls and flowers and gifts really touched me...
16) Ottavegas and all the wonderful peeps there!!!!! The rocking of the corporate box, the text messages on the screen, and some of the audience watching us instead of the BINXS LOL
17) JD's and Garry's acknowledgement of my thank you sign at the Memphis concert
18) Oh, and how could I forget this in Memphis!!! Hearing Hot Girls, Perfect Strangers, God's Top Ten and Elegantly Wasted live with JD for the first time in concert..
19) The last INXS Switched On concert, standing in the front row for hours with numbers and BH after they let me sneak between them, I'll savor every minute of that concert forever...*sniff*
20) But most of all, hanging almost every day here at RBL with you wonderful people for almost 2 years.... *a zillion smooches*